QT: Against My Will

Edited by Psycho S

Proofreaded by P.D Webb.

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Their feelings grew on each other, but neither of them were swayed by such emotions. They were both sly and smart and so, they knew each other’s feelings but said nothing.

Xuan Mu always respected her wishes; he never suggested anything because he was patiently waiting for her not to be scared and make the first move. And he was right.

After four months, out of nowhere, she sent him a picture of herself. The ugliest one she could find. It was a photo from her ID.

.....

“I look like a murderer, right?” Bing Shi laughed gleefully. As always, they were inside their bedrooms, playing games together.

Xuan Mu was shocked beyond belief; would someone like her send pictures of herself to someone like him?

“No, not at all... you’re actually pretty,” Xuan Mu looked at the round girl with black hair combed into a ponytail. Her tightly pressed lips looked as if she was holding back a toothy smile. ‘So this isn’t a dream? She is real...’

‘So pretty...’ He got a reaction... from her face? No, it was the thought of her, showing her attachment to him. He looked down in between his legs. ‘What is she doing to me?’

“Thank you. Can you show me yourself?” she asked.

He went to the bathroom to take a picture of himself and did as she wished.

“You look nice,” she looked at a skinny young boy with a gloomy look. The dark circles under his eyes and some pimples here and there were the most prominent features on his face. Did he try to surpass her murderer look?

“T-thanks,” Xuan Mu stuttered.

His stability was getting worse and worse. He started to get more nightmares about Bing Shi leaving. He thought it would be enough to be friends, but the amount of wet dreams and dirty thoughts he had about her, turned him into a pervert rather than a friend. The more she showed attachment to him, the more he wanted her but at the same time, he also didn’t want to dirty her with his presence. ‘She should stay untouchable. Nobody is worthy of her.’

· · ———- · ???· ———- · ·

“Do you like me more than a friend?” After a year and a half, she asked him out of the blue.

“I do,” Xuan Mu answered straightforwardly. His heartbeat accelerated; his whole body felt hot.

Note N.6. – Just tell the truth; she knows the answer already.

“I do too. Let’s date online. Here is my number. But don’t call me. Just text,” she gave him her contact info.

‘She likes me more than a friend?’ Xuan Mu’s young heart exploded from too many emotions. He was looking at his monitor with his mouth agape. Then, he closed his mouth; dark thoughts started to blur his mind. ‘Is she my girlfriend now?’

‘So from now on, she belongs to me? Does it mean she will never leave me?’ That’s when hell broke down for Xuan Mu. His obsession with Bing Shi brought out the worst in him, and he felt so powerless against it...

Xuan Mu wanted to occupy all of her time. He started to get irritated whenever she left to help out her parents. Even in games, if she began to speak to somebody, his mood would turn black. For him, every action she took was considered cheating.

She had to have the voice chat turned on all the time. He was accompanying her silently during activities she liked, like reading or drawing; they didn’t interrupt each other when she had to study.

“Bing Shi, do you want to watch a movie?” Xuan Mu asked, sending her a link for a webpage, where she could download the movie.

Bing Shi was his.

Why were they taking Bing Shi away from him?

All of them should just go die...

Why was she talking to them?

Stop talking to them...

Was she cheating on him?

He had to stop her from cheating...

“Sure,” Bing Shi agreed enthusiastically and clicked on the link he sent her, “What is it called?”

That’s how both of them stopped playing games for a while and switched to other types of entertainment. It was like having a long-distance date. They would start watching a movie at the same time, what more, the voice chat on their computers would be turned on too, so they could share their opinions.

They were both perfectionists and chatterboxes, so during a movie, they would always point out all the mistakes in a plot while enjoying themselves.

?During action movies:?

“What’s wrong with this police couple? Why are they kissing? There is fire around them- what the heck! People are even throwing bombs at them!” Bing Shi adjusted her headphones as she grimaced while watching the kissing couple.

“Yeah, they’re so unprofessional. They should be fired,” Xuan Mu agreed while munching on something. ‘I would kiss you too. No. Wait... Nobody can see you kiss...’

“What are you eating?” asked Bing Shi when she heard the sounds of him chewing. She giggled when she heard his ASMR sounds.

“Well... eating some gummy snakes,” Xuan Mu answered as he stuffed another chewy sweet into his mouth.

“Why snakes? Why not eat gummy bears like normal people?” Bing Shi asked with curiosity.

He swallowed the snake viciously so he could answer her question.

“I’m scared of snakes,” Xuan Mu answered and put more gummy snakes into his mouth. Obnoxiously, he chewed into the microphone.

“So, you eat snakes because you are afraid of them?” Bing Shi raised her eyebrow.

“Yeah,” he answered as he began to commence another round of eating poor gummy snakes.

“What’s wrong with your logic?” she scrunched her eyebrows into a frown as she tried to comprehend his strange way of thinking, “I’m scared of rats, but I’d never eat a gummy rat. That’s just... ew.”

“You should learn from me,” Xuan Mu bit off the snake’s head. His teeth mercilessly sank into the mildly sweet flesh, “And eat your fears.”

“Haha...No... No thank you, I’m good.”

?During romantic movies:?

“Bing Shi, this is painful to watch,” Xuan Mu cringed, “Their acting is as bad as yours.”

“Yeah, my brain is bleeding,” not minding his little teasing, Bing Shi awkwardly covered her eyes, “I wanted to see a novel adaptation. I didn’t think that it would be such a bad idea.”

“Let’s watch some cartoons to cleanse our souls,” Xuan Mu sent her a new link.

Happily, they began the process of wiping that particular movie from their brain by watching cartoons.

?During historical movies:?

“How can they live without the internet?” asked Bing Shi.

“I wonder too,” Xuan Mu said while munching on something again. ‘I can live without it but not without you.’

“What are you eating this time?” Bing Shi heard him sucking on something.

“Sour candy,” Xuan Mu placed the microphone under his cheek (pressed against his shoulder like a mother would to a phone when her hands were busy) for easier communication. He tilted his head to keep the headset in place as he used one hand to hold a pack of sour candies and the other hand, he used to eat his treats.

“Ewwww,” Bing Shi made a sour face.

“You hate them?” Xuan Mu asked.

“I don’t like anything that’s sour,” Bing Shi gulped down her saliva as she shuddered.

“Good to know,” Xuan Mu smiled evilly as he noted this down in his mind.

In the far future, whenever Xuan Mu ate a sour candy, he would taunt Bing Shi by putting his sour candy into her mouth while their lips pressed against one another just to see her reaction. Right after that, he would happily take his candy back.

?During Comedy movies:?

Xuan Mu chewed on bubble gum, “Bing Shi, what are you eating?”

“I’m eating popcorn. I’m gonna teach you what food you should eat during a movie,” Bing Shi primly replied before she began to munch loudly on her butter popcorn.

“But you’re so loud, I can’t hear their jokes,” Xuan Mu continued chewing his gum silently with a sulken frown.

“Whenever I talk to you, I want to flip a table,” Bing Shi put away her popcorn.

“Noo, I’m going to make popcorn, wait for me,” Xuan Mu returned with a package of popcorn. When he happily sat down with his popcorn, both of them continued watching the movie.

Occasionally, one could hear some crunching sounds from them. At the end of the film, both of them were laughing.

The whole time they were competing to see who was the loudest popcorn chewer!

On Break